Last week, I went to the “Welcome to Kindergarten” meeting that our elementary school puts on for parents of incoming kindergartners. When the principal asked parents to raise their hands if they were sending a child to kindergarten for the first time, more than half the people in the room had air in their armpits. When he asked for a showing of second-time kindergarten parents, the rest of the room responded. My battle-scarred, oven-burned, cuticle-gnawed hand waved alone when the principal asked for third-timers. I felt like a grizzled veteran.
Five minutes into the presentation, a young woman slipped into my row with her small son. I smiled at her and nodded when she asked if the seats next to me were open. She sat down. Her son scampered away to play. I have a surprisingly high tolerance for children when a) I don’t know them, b) I have absolutely no responsibility for them, and c) they aren’t close to my person. So, when he started rolling his monster truck across the linoleum ten feet away from us, it didn’t bother me a bit. It bothered his mother.
When my kids do something in public that embarrasses or otherwise annoys me, they get the Mommy Glare. It’s a freeze-you-in-your-tracks look that can be thrown over great distances such as across a crowded cafeteria or it can be focused like a laser beam such as when employed in a restaurant or a church pew. My Mommy Glare is given with a furrowed brow, gritted teeth and cement-lips. It is normally followed by a just-wait-until-we-get-home speech. I won’t guess at its rate of effectiveness since I use it, regardless of its efficacy, 100% of the time.
The mom next to me fidgeted in her seat, sighing. Here it comes, I thought. Instead, she did something surprising: she leaned forward and smiled. She held this position until her child looked over at her. When he did, she wagged her finger at him while shaking her head and mouthing, “No, no, no.”
The little boy paused before he shrugged and resumed his monster truck rolling.
I stopped listening to the principal so that I could concentrate on watching this woman without appearing to watch her.
Where was her Mommy Glare? Why wasn’t she springing out of her seat? Which Mommy tactic would she pull from her toolbox?
Without taking her eyes from her son, she waited for him to look at her again. When he did, she smiled and crooked her finger at him. He picked up his truck and walked over to her slowly. She continued to smile benevolently. I waited for her to rip off her mask but the moment never came. When he reached her, she whispered in his ear and kissed the top of his head. He rolled his monster truck on the palm of his hand and leaned into her.
I tried not to gape.
I’ve thought about this mom many nights since. I wish I had her patience. I wish I was quicker to smile and less quick to scold. I wish it wouldn’t bother me when my crazy–as it inevitably does–shows.
When I first started blogging (lo, twenty-one moons ago!) I posted about how quickly women – and particularly moms – judge one another. What I didn’t mention is how harshly we judge ourselves.
17 comments
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March 10, 2011 at 6:38 am
Andrea
Oh so true and oh so delicious. Judgement does none of us any good. And to stop ourselves in that moment of fear, the fear that we are not worthy, and remember that we are, and to let our children be who they are, is so hard. Thank you for the reminder. A smile, a light touch, the relationship with our kids, those are the precious things in life.
March 11, 2011 at 9:07 am
Mary the OINKteller
I needed that reminder. In the heat of everyday moments, quite frankly, I forget. Thanks for commenting!
March 10, 2011 at 6:58 am
Lisa Z
I’m betting she operates on a 3-strike rule.
March 11, 2011 at 9:07 am
Mary the OINKteller
I know I do. 😉
March 10, 2011 at 11:27 am
Tori Nelson
Love the bit about your worn, mama hands. I caught a glimpse of mine the other day and thought “You look like you’ve been through war…and kind of you have”.
Seriously impressed with the whisper mom’s patience, but I think I was ready to judge her like you were. I seriously thought the end of your post would be about how he managed to disrupt the whole room and some one else had to take his toy away….How quickly I jump to conclusions!
March 11, 2011 at 9:20 am
Mary the OINKteller
I feel like I am in skirmish after skirmish with my kids. I strive for peace and harmony but almost never feel as though we make it there. And then I see people like the whisper mom and am filled with self doubt. Who doesn’t want that kind of patience? Who didn’t want/hope/expect her kid to blow up in her face? The fact of the matter is – unless you are following a person around 24/7, you don’t who they are. Maybe she had had a horrible day and this was her moment of clarity. Maybe she went to a parenting workshop and was trying a new strategy. Or maybe she’s discovered the secret to mothering. I don’t know. But I’m going to try and remember that moment when I am counting silently to myself and breathing deeply after yet another “grenade” is lobbed my way.
March 10, 2011 at 12:27 pm
melissasmeanderings
I wouldn’t want to know what happens when she blows!
March 11, 2011 at 9:22 am
Mary the OINKteller
*like* It bears pondering!
March 10, 2011 at 1:54 pm
She's a Maineiac
It’s amazing how different every parent’s take on discipline can be. I agree it would be great to suspend judgement on other moms and especially on ourselves. I know with my firstborn, I was very hard on myself. My second child I relaxed a bit and didn’t beat myself up for things like yelling or NOT having patience. Some days are better than others and we’re only human. Trying to find our way and doing our best at the time.
March 11, 2011 at 9:29 am
Mary the OINKteller
Thank you for that. It’s true. Like the army slogan: “Be the best you can be.” (I just finished “Unbroken” by Laura Hillenbrand and so am pretty war-minded at the moment – apologies.) And like someone said on OINKtales’ facebook page, I find I parent with more patience in public. Being a mom is the hardest job I have ever had. And it’s a forever job. Without pay or formal performance reviews. The bonuses are good though: the extra snuggles, the I love yous, the spontaneous riffs of laughter….
March 10, 2011 at 9:10 pm
confusedyuppie
i just hate moms like that. They make the rest of us look so bad! But hey, all said, we’re all WIP arent we? the key is to try i guess
March 11, 2011 at 9:32 am
Mary the OINKteller
I’m trying! I’m trying! I don’t think I’ll ever be a “finished” work, no matter how much effort I put in. But that’s life. Thanks for the empathy and encouragement!
March 11, 2011 at 12:14 pm
Alexis
My scary mommy face is rarely seen in public. Rare like a moose sighting. However in the privacy of my own home around 5:00 pm, its like visiting visiting a moose sanctuary. At feeding time. If you’re standing next to the moose feeding trough.
March 12, 2011 at 12:55 pm
Mary the OINKteller
LOL Alexis! Great analogy. My scary mommy face is on display far too often, both in public and in private. But I’m trying to rein it in as well as to balance it with a laughing, laissez-faire face. The trouble is, my scary face is more memorable than the other.
March 12, 2011 at 4:14 am
The Monster Truck Whisperer (via OINKtales) | braindribbles
[…] But here’s an observation on the Mummy Glare and one woman not using it. Fascinated to know what you think. I’m going to think about this one for a while. I wonder whether I’ll ever have this much patience..? Last week, I went to the “Welcome to Kindergarten” meeting that our elementary school puts on for parents of incoming kindergartners. When the principal asked parents to raise their hands if they were sending a child to kindergarten for the first time, more than half the people in the room had air in their armpits. When he asked for a showing of second-time kindergarten parents, the rest of the room responded. My battle-scarred, oven-burned, cuti … Read More […]
March 14, 2011 at 9:25 am
She must really love Jesus…and Margaritas. « The Ramblings
[…] progressive is Mary’s post “The Monster Truck Whisperer” from OINKtales. When you jump to conclusions, how often are your assumptions justified? When […]
March 16, 2011 at 5:17 am
tinkerbelle86
i used to get the mummy glare…. shivers!!