Yes, I’m a Harry Potter geek. I’m not going to apologize for it. If I could, I’d be going to the midnight viewing of HP7, part deux, but I digress. This rant is not about having to wait two whole days to get my HP fix. No, this morning’s tizzy is brought to you by Small and Large, children of modest intelligence possessing supremely selective hearing.
After a particularly fun and busy weekend filled with good friends, chainsaws, bikes and baseball games, our whole family has a “case of the Mondays.” Both of my boys realized they forgot essential equipment for their day while we were en route to their separate drop-off points. These concurrent memory lapses required me to turn the car around and go home to retrieve the items, wasting my time and two gallons of gas and putting us 20 minutes behind schedule. Adding to my stress was the fact that both boys were supposed to be dropped off at 9 a.m. at locations 4 miles apart.
I told Liam to tuck and roll when I threw him and his stuff out of the car. It was a gravel parking lot. I’m sure he’s just fine.
How’s your day going? Anything you’d like to rant about? Feel free to howl about it in the comments section.
This rant is from a friend in D.C.:
“Parents, please stop allowing your children to put their mouths on the railings when riding on the Metro. I barely want to sit on the seats fully clothed and I cannot even imagine the amount of germs partying on those railings and handlebars. Just saying…”
I wholly agree. Then again, if it keeps them quiet…
OINKtales 
14 comments
Comments feed for this article
July 11, 2011 at 1:01 pm
Katrina
I had a similar selective memory issue with my oldest last night. There are a few things that don’t belong in the dishwasher (good knives, nonstick baking pans) and that has been the policy since they were old enough to load the dishwasher. A couple other items (my good hand-thrown pottery bowls) that need to be put in so that they don’t rest edges on another dish and get chipped. Again, the policy since time immemorial. WHY is it that AGAIN last night I had to call her back up to the kitchen to reload it correctly? And yes, dear, washing the dishes DOES include ALL items on the counter that don’t go in the dishwasher. Yes, that water bottle. And that vase too.
July 12, 2011 at 4:09 pm
Mary the OINKteller
I had thought that problem was chromosomal! Do you know how many times I’ve found the good knives and my grandmother’s china in the dishwasher?
July 11, 2011 at 2:25 pm
ksilva
Ugh. We are also SOOOO having a case of the Mondays here after a fun filled trip to NH to visit friends over the weekend. My two can not get close enough to me and can not stop saying Mooooommmmmmy (annoying!). Nap time was a disaster of parenting skills and I am wondering how the 3 of us will make it through the rest of the day. Nap time really is the new happy hour.
July 12, 2011 at 4:10 pm
Mary the OINKteller
I’ll raise a happy hour beverage to that! It was such a sad day when the kids stopped napping… Hope today was better!
July 11, 2011 at 2:28 pm
Melissa's Meanderings
I think I’d be worried about more than children’s mouths on the metro!
July 12, 2011 at 4:12 pm
Mary the OINKteller
Every blessed particle of them, you mean? I once watched a kid lick the handrail on the DC metro and it nearly made me throw up. I bet that kid’s immune system is KICKIN’ now!
July 12, 2011 at 3:43 am
Lisa Z
Citizens of London: Do not text while walking down the sidewalk during rush hour. I will RUN YOU OVER.
July 12, 2011 at 3:44 am
Lisa Z
Ahhhhh, thanks Mary. I feel better already!
July 12, 2011 at 4:13 pm
Mary the OINKteller
Love it, Lisa! Mow ’em down!
July 12, 2011 at 1:05 pm
Alexis
I just paid $184 to have my $350 dryer repaired. My throat has hurt for days and talking makes it worse but I can’t stop talking because the kids refuse to respond to my frantic hand gestures. I paid a ridiculous sum so a personal trainer could make me too tired to lift my arms this morning. He made me do these horrifying exercises. In the HALLWAY. People walking by giggled at me. I wanted to stab them with a pencil but my arms were too weak to reach up that high. Or lift a pencil.
July 12, 2011 at 4:16 pm
Mary the OINKteller
Damn! I wish I had seen that! I wouldn’t have giggled, I’d have started cheering you on – Jillian style: “Is that all you got, Alexis? Bring it, girl! Dig deep!” This from the person who still can’t do a proper push-up. You know, when I first read your comment, I thought you owned a $350 hair dryer. 😉
July 13, 2011 at 3:35 pm
Kristen
How annoying my voice is to myself when for the thousandth time at the dinner table I have to say “please chew with your mouth closed”. Chomp, chomp, smack….”please chew with your mouth closed”, Quiet……. smack slurp, chomp “please chew with your mouth closed…”……. You get the picture, right?
September 12, 2011 at 8:04 pm
Mary the OINKteller
Oh yes, I get the picture. In fact, I get the exact same picture every meal at my house!
July 14, 2011 at 9:44 am
Tori Nelson
I am cracking up….the tuck-n-roll bit got me!